And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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