Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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