Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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