I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
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