Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
