Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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