The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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