I'm really into asian looking animals
She announced her abortion via fbk
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
