after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
