This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
