This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Randomize