In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
