i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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