Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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