Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
