he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
