I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize