Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
only you would photoshop your dick
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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