the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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