Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
