I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
The struggles of a small town man whore
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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