never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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