It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
