Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
