i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
