it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
