Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
