marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
