Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
