apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
you win again, gameday.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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