I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Why did my mother make you get naked?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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