Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
