No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
