it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I could fuck to npr.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
