that's an acceptable place to lick
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize