Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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