Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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