Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
