I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
