I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
