Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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