I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
He felt like a one man threesome
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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