your room smells of hookers.
And success
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize