Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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