So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
