I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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