Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Randomize
