I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
this is an emotional support booty call
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
