): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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