are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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