You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Small penises have feelings too.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
