Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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