I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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